dad's memorial service will be:
Sunday, May 23, 2010
@
2:00pm
@
NewSong Church
945 W. Covina Blvd.
San Dimas, CA 91773
In lieu of flowers, the family wishes for a donation to be made to NewSong Church, whose mission and vision were close to Dad's heart. If you so choose, please put the words "In Memory of Don Hays" in the memo section of your check or in the comments section for the online donation site. All donations are tax-deductible.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
the good fight has been fought...
Dad went to be with Jesus yesterday morning at 5:43am. it was a peaceful departing. he was where he wanted to be when he died -- at home.
on wednesday morning, mom and i decided that something needed to change about dad's care because it became more and more difficult to get him to the bathroom and back. that morning, mom had an appointment so my brother Gregg and i took care of him for those midday hours. the hospice doctor, nurse and social worker came around 1pm, which was the time mom came back from her appointment. we decided to order a hospital bed and necessary meds to keep him comfortable in what we knew would be his last days.
the bed came and he was transferred into it. the doctor told us it would be no more than a week, maybe two. little did we know that 12 hours later, he would be in heaven! it was really so fast, i don't think we even understand it. MCC is so aggressive and such a fast moving cancer. the doctor and nurses had never seen anything like it.
we had asked our church's care team earlier in the day to ask some gentlemen in our church to come and sit with dad through the night so mom and i could get some sleep [i don't think mom has slept much in the last two months!]. an elder from our church came and sat with dad, prayed over him through the night, and stayed with him through those last few difficult hours. what a blessing for us!
God made himself known through every part of my dad's journey, even these last few days. he felt little or no pain. he had a positive attitude about life and even about this fight, willing to go the distance to do everything to defeat it with God's and science's help. so much to live for! and all of those tough treatments of chemo and radiation prolonged his life; he supported me through every major life event one can have, even losing a spouse to death.
i love my daddy and i will miss him so much. i have all the wisdom that he passed on to me that i may pass on to my children and those funny sayings he had.... what a funny guy he could be sometimes.
i love you, daddy. give Brian a big hug for me. i'll see you again someday.
Psalm 91
14 The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me.
I will protect those who trust in my name.
15 When they call on me, I will answer;
I will be with them in trouble.
I will rescue and honor them.
16 I will reward them with a long life
and give them my salvation.”
on wednesday morning, mom and i decided that something needed to change about dad's care because it became more and more difficult to get him to the bathroom and back. that morning, mom had an appointment so my brother Gregg and i took care of him for those midday hours. the hospice doctor, nurse and social worker came around 1pm, which was the time mom came back from her appointment. we decided to order a hospital bed and necessary meds to keep him comfortable in what we knew would be his last days.
the bed came and he was transferred into it. the doctor told us it would be no more than a week, maybe two. little did we know that 12 hours later, he would be in heaven! it was really so fast, i don't think we even understand it. MCC is so aggressive and such a fast moving cancer. the doctor and nurses had never seen anything like it.
we had asked our church's care team earlier in the day to ask some gentlemen in our church to come and sit with dad through the night so mom and i could get some sleep [i don't think mom has slept much in the last two months!]. an elder from our church came and sat with dad, prayed over him through the night, and stayed with him through those last few difficult hours. what a blessing for us!
God made himself known through every part of my dad's journey, even these last few days. he felt little or no pain. he had a positive attitude about life and even about this fight, willing to go the distance to do everything to defeat it with God's and science's help. so much to live for! and all of those tough treatments of chemo and radiation prolonged his life; he supported me through every major life event one can have, even losing a spouse to death.
i love my daddy and i will miss him so much. i have all the wisdom that he passed on to me that i may pass on to my children and those funny sayings he had.... what a funny guy he could be sometimes.
i love you, daddy. give Brian a big hug for me. i'll see you again someday.
Psalm 91
14 The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me.
I will protect those who trust in my name.
15 When they call on me, I will answer;
I will be with them in trouble.
I will rescue and honor them.
16 I will reward them with a long life
and give them my salvation.”
Saturday, May 8, 2010
hard days....
friends-- i wrote the following in mid April but never made it on to my blog site to publish it. i will be posting a further update tomorrow:
I hesitate to write as it is difficult for me, but here goes.
My dad has been told by his doctors that there are no more treatments that he
may receive. No more radiation. No more chemotherapy. The reason for this is
because the treatment has become ineffective. It's no longer working.
And it's true. He would receive treatment and the tumors continued to grow, as
they do now. They are growing very quickly. The kids and I went away for an
overnight stay at a friend's and when we got home, I noticed a significant
amount of growth from the tumors; even new ones had formed. Also, the older
tumors have begun to weep and bleed as the cancer is eating through the skin.
The large tumors beneath or near his jaw have begun to displace it, making it
difficult for him to eat or drink. Honestly, my father looks very little like
his former self. His voice is changing, too, as the tumors encroach upon his
esophagus and throat area.
Dad's mood is melancholy as he worries about the coming days. I pray he looks to
the skies for the hand of God to bless him and the arms of Jesus to comfort him.
Though he does try to keep a good attitude for us sometimes, he is depressed and
emotionally and physically exhausted a lot of the time.
And so, family and friends, I write an honest account of the happenings here. It
is not easy. Mom is his 24/7 nurse, while dr's and nurses from hospice care have
now begun to visit at least once a week. I try to help when I am home, as I have
a new job that allows me to continue homeschooling the kids.
Please pray for us all here and give Mom or Dad a call or email to encourage. We
will let you know further in awhile, if more help is needed. Thank you for your
prayers.
I hesitate to write as it is difficult for me, but here goes.
My dad has been told by his doctors that there are no more treatments that he
may receive. No more radiation. No more chemotherapy. The reason for this is
because the treatment has become ineffective. It's no longer working.
And it's true. He would receive treatment and the tumors continued to grow, as
they do now. They are growing very quickly. The kids and I went away for an
overnight stay at a friend's and when we got home, I noticed a significant
amount of growth from the tumors; even new ones had formed. Also, the older
tumors have begun to weep and bleed as the cancer is eating through the skin.
The large tumors beneath or near his jaw have begun to displace it, making it
difficult for him to eat or drink. Honestly, my father looks very little like
his former self. His voice is changing, too, as the tumors encroach upon his
esophagus and throat area.
Dad's mood is melancholy as he worries about the coming days. I pray he looks to
the skies for the hand of God to bless him and the arms of Jesus to comfort him.
Though he does try to keep a good attitude for us sometimes, he is depressed and
emotionally and physically exhausted a lot of the time.
And so, family and friends, I write an honest account of the happenings here. It
is not easy. Mom is his 24/7 nurse, while dr's and nurses from hospice care have
now begun to visit at least once a week. I try to help when I am home, as I have
a new job that allows me to continue homeschooling the kids.
Please pray for us all here and give Mom or Dad a call or email to encourage. We
will let you know further in awhile, if more help is needed. Thank you for your
prayers.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
